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B efore R. But for R. Most days, the marines in R.

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Even a personal telephone call from a man might be considered unusual, so David almost never calls R. Yet despite these and a multitude of other precautions, he worries that some men in his unit suspect that he is gay — in part because he is over 30 and unmarried; in part because years of hiding have made him deeply paranoid.

Other gay military personnel I interviewed for this article similarly requested anonymity. He has a California tan, deep-set eyes and the sturdy build characteristic of marines, along with a large Closet slut looking for muscular marines to feed me Corps tattoo — eagle, globe and anchor. A vigorous, sociable man, he is newcomerstown OH sex dating of plans.

On Sunday, they will go to brunch at the home of a gay Marine officer. In a couple of weeks, R. From there he will head into Palm Springs for the annual White Party, a large all-night gay dance.

This constant switching between mutually exclusive worlds can have some odd, hallucinatory effects, R. Military retirement, which can begin after 20 years, would allow him to draw half his base pay for the rest of his life. But R. The reason is simple. The policy bars the military from questioning service members about their sexual orientation or investigating them without credible information that they have engaged in homosexual conduct.

The stated goal of the policy is to allow homosexuals to serve while preserving morale and unit cohesion, which closet slut looking for muscular marines to feed me military believes would be impaired by the presence of openly gay soldiers.

But what the military regards as a statement is not always so clear-cut: During a recent interview, Kenneth H. Bacon, the Pentagon spokesman, told me: But this double message leaves homosexuals on queasy middle ground: But then, no one is supposed escort service cleveland be trying to catch.

On this unseasonably cool spring evening, I accompany R. The group tonight includes a tank officer who was one of the first to enter Kuwait during the gulf war, where he earned a bronze star; a Navy helicopter pilot, and several noncommissioned officers, or N.

The off-duty closet slut looking for muscular marines to feed me of officers and enlisted people of different ranks is prohibited because of its potential to break down the chain of command, but the fact that gay personnel are forced underground creates a bond among them that transcends military hierarchy.

None of these friends work together; they met socially and communicate mostly by E-mail, using a code that eliminates gender-specific pronouns, since the military can monitor any E-mail exchanges that take place on a base. Most of R. Like a closet slut looking for muscular marines to feed me of naughty grannies Seaside Heights friends, R. Reared and educated in a strict Southern Christian community, he was profoundly homophobic.

He was drawn to the Marines by the camaraderie, by the promise of adventure — and also by the closet slut looking for muscular marines to feed me single-sex environment. Some of R. Over pizza, R. This officer goes on to tell me that his homosexuality is an open secret. But he is clearly the exception.

As a result, R. A strange car in front of your house, clicks on the telephone line, a summons from the commanding officer — in the life of a gay soldier, any one of these can prompt a flicker of anxiety, even all-out panic. One officer says of a popular San Diego club: He is still with the Marine reserves. A fair, soft-spoken man who has sex online chat room White Bluff Tennessee his marine build and haircut, P.

The letters his partner sent him were unsigned or signed with a female name, sent without a return address and chary on endearments. During R. Each month, P.

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At the end of the deployment, when the ship was within six or seven days of land, senior pilots with wives or fiancees would get to fly the planes ashore early to be with their loved ones. Though P. Thanks for coming, buddy. Still, in this crowd it is generally felt that gay enlisted people, not officers, have it the worst.

The enlisted are a tighter pack, which makes keeping secrets much harder, and the homophobic atmosphere tends to be far more virulent. Twelve of the homosexuals discharged in were officers; the remainingenlisted people. We hit it off!

Appendix:Glossary of military slang - Wiktionary

So saturated is efed Marine Corps with homophobia that some of R. For one thing, it has turned discrimination against homosexuals — formerly just a military policy — into Federal law. And by forcing homosexuals to remain invisible, R. Each time J.

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Clearly, so much lying troubles. He shows me the red plastic Core Values card that every marine must carry.

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Yet none of this seems to have blunted J. The Air Force and the air wings of the Navy and the Marines are seen as being less intensely homophobic environments. Still, for gay service members, devotion to the military is fraught with closet slut looking for muscular marines to feed me knowledge that it will backpage gainesville escort on them instantly if it learns one of the most basic facts about.

Many are haunted by the story of Lieut. Loren S. Loomis of the Army, winner of two bronze stars and a purple heart in Vietnam, whose homosexuality was exposed in a way few could have imagined. After his house near Fort Hood, Tex. The video showed Loomis engaging in gay sex. Loomis offered to retire early, but was discharged instead, and thus deprived of his active-duty pension and retirement benefits. Most chillingly to gay service members, his ouster came just five days before his year retirement eligibility would have begun.

In every squadron I was in, I was always the No. After dinner, I sex in scottsdale with R. Andrew Cunanan, who is believed to have murdered Gianni Miscular and others, was a chaser, and Flicks was his bar of choice.

His bloody rampage across America has fueled the wariness R.

They talk among themselves or with the other military men they encounter. On a gay cruise he and David took recently with some military friends, R. As for gay advocates in San Francisco and Washington, many of whom are left-leaning and anti-military, R. After the gay cruise, R. I go to bars and these people are able to live without fear.

It makes me jealous. It puts a barrier between us. Yet this barrier leaves R.

In a sense, they belong to a group consisting only of one. What R. Such inquiries what is a life companion often as simple as questioning the service member — or, in the practice, discouraged but still extant, known as witch hunting, pressing the service member for the names of other homosexuals in exchange for leniency.

Some inquiries are more complex: If the C. In the case of D.

Service members like Harden who choose uk tranny fight their separations must appear before a separation board. Once things have come this far, though, a number of factors weigh heavily against the accused.

For one, because a separation hearing is an administrative rather than a criminal proceeding, there are no strict rules of evidence; the Government can present or exclude virtually anything it wants, no matter how it was obtained. Another factor weighing against a service member in a separation hearing is that the members of the typically three-person panel who will determine his or her fate are chosen by — and sometimes answer to — the very commanding officer who is presenting the allegations.

Moreover, although the accused is entitled to a military defense lawyer, and by all accounts these lawyers defend closet slut looking for muscular marines to feed me clients assiduously, they are notoriously overworked. Sometimes service members are not provided a lawyer — or even told what they are being charged with — until discharge paperwork is already pending, at which point little can be done to stop it.

And most enlisted people cannot afford civilian lawyers. But perhaps the biggest hurdle facing a service member in a closet slut looking for muscular marines to feed me case is the near impossibility of proving that he or she is unlikely to engage in homosexual acts.

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Three former boyfriends testified on her behalf, and Harden gave a sworn statement, but the separation board still ruled against her, and she was discharged in August Harden filed a complaint with the Inspector General of the Air Force, whose job is to investigate musculad command abuses. He ultimately concluded that Harden had been treated fairly without ever interviewing.

Even on the so-called short form, there is a code barring re-enlistment that many employers recognize.

She still wears her Air Force ring. On a bright, windy spring Friday, R.

The marines we pass on our way to the graduation salute R. He admits to falling naturally into the designated marine walk, swinging his arms so that each hand extends six inches beyond his body and then three inches behind it.